


The Here and the Now

by Shadow_Assassin



Category: Deadpool - Fandom, Spider-Man - Fandom, spideypool - Fandom
Genre: Confession, Dedication, Depression, Desperation, Family, Guilt, Hurt, Love, Loyalty, M/M, Pain, Sharing, Trust, self hate, visit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-23
Updated: 2016-10-23
Packaged: 2018-08-24 03:04:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8354413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadow_Assassin/pseuds/Shadow_Assassin
Summary: Wade had never thought this would happen. He assumed that Peter would come back after mission like he does after any other one. He thought maybe he'd have the guts to tell Peter what he really thought about him. How his heart feels while standing next to him. To tell him how he loves him.  But everything goes drastically wrong.





	

" Mr. Willson, you are the least qualified to inform his only remaining family."

" Really? Why is that?" The Merc asks bitterly.

" Wilson I understand you had an acquaintance with Parker but that doesn't mean you have the right to tell his aunt of his identity and-"

" Acquaintance?" Wade snaps cutting Fury off. " We where friends! I was the only one ever there for him besides his aunt! Even in the end, I was the only one!"

" The only one to what exactly?"

" To care! I was the only one who ever was there for him!" Wade yells at the man of authority.

" Wilson there were plenty of people here that cared for Peter. Much more then you are capable of. You are well known for your selfish acts."

" Are you sure about that?" The dangerous Anti-Hero asks. His mask revealing a matching expression as his demeanor.

Peter had been so much more than a Friend to him. Peter didn't look down on him, yet Wade still looked up. Peter had taken his time to be patient with Wade, to learn what he was like under all the crazy. Peter had trusted him.

Peter brought him to meet May once Wade had deemed himself brave enough to meet her without the mask. Peter had smiled so truly at Wade. Peter had called him a friend.

The title had both made Wade's heart soar, but he couldn't deny the slight sting it left behind. He liked Peter far beyond a friend.

" We are aware of you're interactions with Mr. Parker but that doesn't put you in any more of a place to-"

" Yes, it does! I know May! I know what she's going to go through when she finds out." Wade lashes out at the man.

Fury is silent as Deadpool continues his rant, the boxes enraged by the lack of emotion from the man.

Their Baby Boy had been ripped away from him because of a stupid decision the director had made. He lost two of his best assets on the avenger team because he had failed to look at the situation from all angles. He allowed them to walk into a trap while everyone was held back from helping. Even Deadpool had been forced to watch helplessly, not allowed to help even though he knew he could. He knew as well as anyone else yet he was still detained. Wasn't allowed to rush forward. He was immortal. He should have been there to protect the most important person in his life.

•••••

" Mrs. Parker?"

" Yes?" The woman asks, eyeing the man. The bright red mask sending negative messages about the mysterious man standing at her door. " I'm sorry but I don't think we've met."

Wade shifts slightly, unsure and nervousness about her possible reaction. He wasn't entirely afraid to show her his face anymore, but what would she think of him as Deadpool?

" May... It's...I'm Wade." He says before very hesitantly pulling of the mask.

The middle-aged woman's eyes widen ever so slightly in an alarmed surprise before glancing down at the rest of his outfit, taking in the sight of the belt and numerous weapons. Her hand came to cover her mouth as she said nothing. She knew who Deadpool was, what his profession is.

" Wade." She finally says, picking her words carefully as she looks at the man staring at the ground in shame of himself. The overhang of the roof keeping him dry from the heavy rain falling around him. " What are you doing?" She asks. Her words are neither harsh or sad. Just confused. Confused as to why he would openly reveal himself as a killer on her doorstep.

" Mrs. Parker I have something I need to explain. It's about Peter." Wade says, forcing away the tears that are threatening to be drawn up.

May looks at him, Worry washing over her face. " You didn't..." She lets the sentence Fall as she glances at his katanas and firearms once again.

Wade quickly shakes his head. Horror working its way into his chest that the very idea. " No. No, I didn't do anything. I couldn't have ever hurt him."

( We never hurt him.)

[ Except once. The moment we didn't do anything, we hurt him the most.]

( But now it won't ever happen again.)

" Come." She says quietly. The dark haired woman moving aside to let her boy's friend into her home.

Wade tentatively listens, shutting the door behind him to keep out the chill of the rain. He's led through the home to the familiar living room where aunt May motions for him to sit. He does and she takes the seat across from him.  

Dread, fear, and sadness force him into twisting the mask in his hands in an anxious reserved energy. He wants to hide from this. To hide from the truth. He wished he didn't have to say it. It will make it all the more real.

May senses his distressed emotions caused by many elements. He looks to the cushion next to him where Peter had once sat on one of the visits be brought Wade with to see May. He could practically hear an echo of his laugh as he had sat so close to Wade. The warmth around them...and Peter's smile.

" What happened?" May asks when the Merc doesn't speak, forcing him to let go of the memory. " Wade, what happened to my boy?"

Wade glances at her before back at the ground. He couldn't say it. No. It would be too much. That would mean it really happened. He couldn't-

....but he has to.

" Peter's dead," Wade says almost too quietly to consider it a whisper. Tears sting his eyes as his heart clenched. He couldn't go back now.

May doesn't move or make a sound for a long time as she stares back at the eternally young man sitting across from her with a poor attempt at keeping his face void of expression.

" How?" She finally asks in a small voice that is clearly trying to deny the idea of her son gone.

" There was a bomb."

" I didn't hear anything about it-"

" You wouldn't have. It was down in Germany and was quickly covered up by the governments. Peter was on a mission with the Avengers." Wade says.

" What was he doing with those people? What good was he to them?" She asks, blame in her tone as she speaks of the team.

" Peter was very important to the Avengers... He wanted to tell you but he was always afraid you'd get hurt... Peter is...was Spider-Man."

May stares at the scared man in shock before she closes her eyes and looks down. She manages to stay silent for the first years before she audibly starts to cry. Wade looks away guiltily, unable to watch. Not wanting to risk another break down of his own, but that doesn't stop the tears starting to fall from his own eyes.

" What happened?" She manages to choke out.

" He was supposed to help evacuate a building under a bomb threat. He was sent in with another teammate. Neither of them made it out." Wade responds quietly, quickly wiping away more tears that have begun to fall at a more persistent rate as he remembers the feeling of running towards the distraction. Past the people holding him back. Finding the broken body of the arachnid who had tried to protect a small child in vain. Peter had been gone by the time Wade had found his Friend. The image of how his limp body hung on Wade's grip. How his head lolled back.

" Who was with him?" May asks after a long silence of Wade lost in the horrific images.

" Clint Barton. Also known as Hawkeye." Wade answers as he stares at the ground. His fingers itching to pull the mask back on. Not only had Wade lost Peter, but the only other person he could think of calling a friend.

It is quiet for a very long time as they both mourn. Sniffs and small movement to try will away tears are the only things interrupting the silence.

•••••

" You loved Peter, didn't you? The way I saw you look at him. You wanted more than just his friendship. You wanted his love didn't you?" May asks softly as the two stand in the cool air of autumn a year later, staring down at the glossy, dark stone coming out of the ground.

Tears are almost instantly filling Wade's eyes at the calm statement of the wise woman.

He shakes his head ever so lightly, his gaze not leaving the headstone. " I wouldn't have been any good for him. No one could love someone like me back. I didn't want to ruin what we already had"

" You're wrong. He would have returned your love. He was just too scared at the time. Love had hurt him so many times, he was afraid of it. He was so confused over you."

They are quiet again, leaving Wade to mourn over lost opportunities. Lost chances and broken hopes.

" I Was going to tell him," Wade confesses. " I was going to tell him when he returned from the mission. But... But he never did. Now he's gone.  
...  
My chance is gone."

 

Say what you need in the here and the now, for the there and the then may never begin.

**Author's Note:**

> Opinions? And I'm looking for a Beta reader for my works. My one-shots aren't my main concern ( but are still up for a good check over) but my main story StopWatch really needs a beta. If anyone is interested or knows someone who is please help. Thank chu (\\(^^)/)


End file.
